Every approach to dealing with death is different because it's an individual choice. In today's world, there are a variety of options in funeral service. Knowing your legal rights in making those funeral arrangements or handling those funeral arrangements yourself is vitally important to the process. "Final Rights: Reclaiming the American Way of Death," written by authors Joshua Slocum and Lisa Carlson, is the most important resource book to guide you through the funeral process state-by-state.
In my years of experience as a Funeral Celebrant, the more hands-on a family is in their involvement in the funeral planning process and the resulting funeral service, the more healing the experience. If that means the family wants to make their own memorial folders, help dress the body or simply comb grandma's hair for that final day, then so be it. That last personal act of kindness and love, whether big or small, may be what the family needs to start healing. Imagine taking that personal approach further and eliminating the funeral home's involvement completely. Whatever the request, the family should be allowed to do it but there are limits as to what a family can legally do in some states. Maneuvering those requirements can be challenging in certain states. Answering the need, "Final Rights" details the legalities of what you can do in the process of dealing with the dead. With the most recent research, the authors have managed to provide a road map of legalities to funeral service inside and outside of using a funeral home. As a result, it's a fabulous, fascinating read.
I especially appreciated that in the preface both authors shared their own experiences in dealing with death, dying and questioning the funeral industry to emphasize the importance of doing things your intended way. With my own personal experience, I can stress that if you don't do what you need to do in the process of a loved one's funeral, it may haunt you for the rest of your life. There are no do-overs in funeral service. If grandma didn't want to be embalmed and you feel coerced into embalming her, you can't un-embalm her after it's done. With the help of this book, it reminds everyone to get funeral wishes in order, plan accordingly, ask questions, and follow-through on the plan.
-- "American Chronicle (Reviewer: Pam Vetter)"
